Author: JoAnna Brandi
Why can Southwest do what other airlines can't? There are dozens of reasons why one company does a better job than another in delivering delightful experiences to their customers. Some of those reasons have to do with culture, with vision, with intent, with working conditions, with attitude. And with training. When companies understand how truly valuable the customer is to their overall success, they make sure to train people in such a way that they deal with them appropriately under all circumstances.
My friend Paula came to visit this weekend. We've been good friends for almost twenty years, but over the last two years we live close enough to spend a little more time together. Thanks to Southwest Airlines and their $30 fares, we now visit frequently.
Paula travels a lot but had never used Southwest before she moved to Tampa. She is fascinated by them. Her experiences have been consistently positive and she's become a keen observer of what they do to make that so. This weekend she witnessed an incident in the Tampa airport that spoke of the high level of skill of the people of Southwest.
Apparently the flight was oversold and they asked for volunteers to take a later flight. Paula paid little attention until she heard the loud voice of an unhappy passenger. A gentleman on the line was decidedly agitated and in her words "going ballistic." The person at the ticket counter was busy helping another passenger but took great care to make eye contact with the agitated passenger and assure him that she would indeed help him. "Sir, let me look into it, I'll be with you in just a moment" was delivered in a kind, caring and concerned voice and not with the just-wait-until-I'm finished-what-I'm doing attitude that we so often experience.
Once the man got to the front of the line, she dealt with him with great skill. She did a great job of helping him understand that she in fact was *helping* him. She calmed him down and she stayed cool through the whole interaction. She stayed emotionally detached (didn't get hooked into his drama) and was not the least bit defensive in her handling of the situation. He walked away, seeming satisfied, but then returned with another concern. She looks up and says, " You know what? If I were in your shoes I would be worried about just the same things you are. Let's take another look at how we have you routed." She rechecked his routing and connecting flights, maintaining rapport with him at all times and assured him that he had a good deal and he went away happy. Paula, a customer care practitioner to the core, couldn't wait to tell me about her observations.
She's sold on Southwest and the on time pleasant experiences they provide. She contrasts them with those experiences she has with other airlines, like a recent encounter she had on the telephone with a USAir representative. She had gotten home a little late from work and needed some information about an upcoming trip she was planning and so dialed USAir. After 15 minutes of being on hold she decided to start making her dinner, so she proceeded to cut the ingredients for her salad. As luck would have it she popped a cucumber into her mouth just moment before the rep picked up. "This is Nadine, may I help you?" "Um, crunch, gulp," Paula managed, trying to get her first words out of her now full mouth. Suddenly she heard, in tone as condescending as she had every heard, "Excuse ME, I cannot understand you while you are EATING, that's very ANNOYING!"
"No less annoying than your attitude is." Paula managed before hanging up the phone, now having to start the process all over again, so as not to have to deal with Nadine.
Why can Southwest do what other airlines can't she asked? There are dozens of reasons why one company does a better job than another in delivering delightful experiences to their customers. Some of those reasons have to do with culture, with vision, with intent, with working conditions, with attitude. And with training. When companies understand how truly valuable the customer is to their overall success, they make sure to train people in such a way that they deal with them appropriately under all circumstances.
In light of the fact that so many people are stressed right now, here are some suggestions from me in dealing non-defensively with upset customers.
Be aware. The first step is always to be aware that you have a choice in how you deal with any situation. Take a deep breath and make the Win/Win choice.
Disassociate/Disengage. Back off from the situation either physically or emotionally. Step back and ask yourself what assumptions you are making. Change them and reframe the situation. Your own competency is usually not in question, others are not usually trying to attack you personally. If it feels like someone is "attacking" your competency it helps to say to yourself, "they must be misunderstanding my intent, I'll try to communicate it better". This frees you from having to defend yourself and you can refocus on the results you want from the communication.
Empathize. Imagine yourself in their shoes. Empathy is a quality of the heart. Empathy is compassion. (Sympathy is relating from emotions.) Compassion for another person is a connection. Empathy is being present in the moment with another, accepting them and acknowledging their experience. (In sympathy we lose our objectivity.)
Listen and Ask Questions. Inquire about issues of concern to the other party. Focus on the task at hand not on your own disagreement with the other. Listen to their perspective. This brings you valuable info about the issue involved and demonstrates to the other that their point of view is something you care about.
Disclose. Reveal your own needs and goals in an honest, open and forth-right fashion.
Be assertive but non-defensive. Apologize.
Use "I" statements, a powerful way to communicate. "You" statements sound accusing and blaming and often provoke an instant defensive reaction. "I" statements remove that. Express yourself without blaming others. Other phrases that trigger defensive responses -absolutes, "You always, you never, everybody says" Absolutes are rarely, if ever true, so they lead to further disagreements, sometimes unrelated to the situation at hand.
Uncover the real issues and de-personalize them. Our work is some-thing we do, not what we are, we often take things personally because we neglect to separate the person from the behavior. Blame the process not the people. Free yourself from the need to react defensively.
Remember that we have little control over the attitudes and personalities of others but when we change our behavior towards them, especially using these techniques, their behavior towards us often changes as well. Actively choose your response.
Skillful communication is a master skill. Make it your business to be a superb communicator. If the company doesn't train you, get yourself educated anyway. Good communication skills will serve you well in all arenas of your life.
Copyright 2003 by JoAnna Brandi. Used with permission.